Things That Never Happen

Things That Never Happen

I hate to burst any bubbles here but men do not stand undercomfortably close to one another for long periods of time thrusting while in their underpants. Catalogs would have you believe this is an everyday occasion, they are lying to you.

Also mustard underpants = fail.
Halloween Countdown piece of the Day:

Mix and Mold Monsters $1.88 each, I am probably still not patient enough to do these any sort of justice…

About The Author

Mantooth
AKA Brian Heiler author of "Rack Toys: Cheap, Crazed Playthings" and co-editor of "Toy-Ventures Magazine". Co-Host of the "Pod Stallions" podcast. Host of the Brick Mantooth Youtube channel, painter, designer, writer, mental health advocate, toy collector, Mego, and Mego Knock-Off enthusiast. I have large feet, ADHD and I live in Canada. Talk toys, not others.

14 Comments

  • plasticfetish on October 7, 2009

    I hate to burst YOUR bubble, but I grew up in San Francisco in the '70s, and I'd be willing to bet that there was a fair bit of "standing undercomfortably close to one another for long periods of time while thrusting in their underpants" going on.

    The guy on the left looks like one of my old math teachers.

  • Shawn Robare on October 7, 2009

    Mustard underwear = protection from dribblers. Someone had to say it.

  • Wings on October 7, 2009

    Although, if you were to purchase underwear that looked like that, and you happened up not one, but TWO other dudes with the same tastes, maybe you would be the type to stand around chatting and um, thrusting.

  • MrJeffery on October 7, 2009

    very american apparel.

  • Anonymous on October 7, 2009

    Very disturbing

  • Anonymous on October 7, 2009

    "c'mon Ted…you go first"

  • John III on October 7, 2009

    My eyes hurt, and my sensibilities are damaged…..but I think I've discovered my new Halloween costume!

  • blueroc85 on October 8, 2009

    Question: DO guys really tuck their shirts into their undies like the picture is demonstrating?!

  • rob! on October 8, 2009

    AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

  • rob! on October 8, 2009

    Wow, a deleted scene from Love! Valor! Compassion!

  • rob! on October 8, 2009

    "The early uniform redos for Star Trek: The Motion Picture weren't met with enthusiasm."

  • Anonymous on October 10, 2009

    All that standing and thrusting is obviously due to the fact that they are wearing eachothers underwear. You know both the blue and green patterned numbers went together. What I can't figure out is where is the forth guy who has the mustard t-shirt and the pink briefs…or perhaps I really don't want to know!

  • Roberto Flores on June 25, 2010

    Aqui nosotros hacemos eso todo el tiempo, de hecho, ahora mismo estoy en el living de mi casa con amigos y estamos todos en calzones!
    Perfectamente natural por estos lares.

  • Anonymous on May 24, 2015

    "Hey guys! Let's all get in our trendy, trendy underwear, and tell cool stories!"

    Whaa?

    Hee, hee!

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