Milky The Marvelous Milking Cow

Milky The Marvelous Milking Cow

Truly one of the more WTF? toys of the 1970s, Milky was based on the assumption that children would want to play with a cow’s teets endlessly. You see, Milky drinks water and then you’re encouraged to milk her. That’s it, that’s all! Theres a tarp so you don’t make a mess.
Is anybody else more than a little creeped out by this toy? I’m going to go out on a limb and say that 1977 was probably a busy year at Kenner, they had Six Million Dollar Man money and their latest license, Star Wars was exploding at the box office and the demand for product was insane. Somehow Milky just slipped by, either that or it was the result of martini lunch dare.

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About The Author

Mantooth
AKA Brian Heiler author of "Rack Toys: Cheap, Crazed Playthings" and co-editor of "Toy-Ventures Magazine". Co-Host of the "Pod Stallions" podcast. Host of the Brick Mantooth Youtube channel, painter, designer, writer, mental health advocate, toy collector, Mego, and Mego Knock-Off enthusiast. I have large feet, ADHD and I live in Canada. Talk toys, not others.

9 Comments

  • plasticfetish on August 19, 2009

    Oh god, I totally forgot about this. My sister had this thing, and I'll tell you something… once a 7 year old girl gets bored with Milky, she tends to do weird things. I vaguely remember feeding milky Kool-Aid, so that we could watch it put out "red stuff."

    Yeah, trust me, we ruined that toy.

  • David on August 19, 2009

    My older cousin had one of these two but when I saw it, it had been sitting in a cupboard for five years. I never stopped being fascinated by it.

  • Wings on August 19, 2009

    RUSTY BUCKETS!!! I had forgotten all about this milking cow!!! Wow… flashback time!

  • Bubbashelby on August 19, 2009

    My sister had one as well. As I recall it was brown though, not black/white.

    It was groovy.

  • JFStan on August 20, 2009

    Milky was far more successful than it's predecessor "Harriet the Hilarious Beheadable Hen". Ahh, farm life. 🙂

  • blueroc85 on August 20, 2009

    Plasticfetish: thanks for my daily laugh. I am envisioning all of the creative things you may have tried to get Milky to drink!

    I am curious….how did it turn the water white (or was this real milk)? The video did not explain the technology behind Milky.

  • Steve on August 26, 2009

    "Her pree-tend milk is a-fillin' the pail!"
    They just don't write jingles like that anymore.

  • Anonymous on October 22, 2009

    I had one of these as well. She later became "Barbie's" cow. To answer the question above: Milky came with a bunch of weird white pills. You'd pull off her udders, put the pill in the udders, and put the udder back on. Then you'd shove her head in the water-filled trough and yank her talk to make her "drink" until she'd raise her head and moo. Soon, white liquid came out of the udders. It was pretty weird.

  • Anonymous on November 23, 2012

    If anyone knows where I can get one, please let me know. I had one and would love to get one for my kid. I loved that toy!

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